Today is our national holiday in Germany. (The reason why it's not on November 9th, when the wall actually did go down thirty years ago, is because of all those other events also happening on November 9th - infamously the "Reichskristallnacht" in 1938, famously Philip Scheidemann declaring the first German republic in 1918, infamously Hitler making his first attempt at grabbing power and failing in 1923, famously Georg Elser trying to blow up Hitler and failing in 1939, and so on and so forth. If something major either awful or good happened in Germany in the 20th century, chances are it happened on Novembert 9th.) Said holiday is my excuse for sharing one of my favourite anecdotes from later 19th century German history, not least because it illustrates said history didn't just consist of Prussian nobles yelling "Jawohl!", film industry not withstanding. Also it's entertaining. (There's a version of this story known as "the sausage duel" making the rounds in the English speaking world which is funny, but also completely untrue. I'll get to that version, too.)

In one corner we have: Otto von Bismarck, future Imperial Chancellor, current Ministerpräsident of Prussia. To his admirers a magnificent bastard and political genius, soon to be responsible for German reunification, military victories and for creating a complicated system of alliances ensuring the newly unified German empire remains on top. To his enemies, he's just a bastard, also a reactionary and encourager of every -ism around, and the creator of a political system that's entirely dependent on someone like him being chancellor with a rubber stamping Emperor, and is bound to collapse once power is handed over to Willy someone else.

In the other corner, we have: Rudolf Virchow, medical pioneer (check out the wiki entry I linked for all he's discovered, labelled or pushed forward), former revolutionary of 1848, currently determined liberal MP and social reformer. To his admirers, a legendary scientist and conscience of the nation. His enemies think he's an unpatriotic know-it-all despite not knowing it all, as evidenced by him being anti-Darwin. (There are also the type of enemies objecting to Virchow disproving newly fashionable "racial" theories by studying 6.758 827 school children and coming to the conclusion there was neither such a thing as a "German" nor a "Jewish" race. But we're not counting them.)

(BTW, Virchow's results among many other things also illustrate that not only the Nazis - who hated Virchow and abolished all statues, street names etc. honoring him - but also Hollywood casting constantly gets it wrong in terms of looks for the late 19th century German states. Quoth Virchow's report: "For example, 35 of a hundred Prussian school children are blond; and in Bavaria only 26 of a hundred. While dark skinned children in Bavaria are 21 of a hundred, they're only 12% of all counted school children in Prussia", and so forth.)

The day: June 2nd, 1865. (Complete German unification, the Prussian/French war and the Second Empire are still five years into the future.) The liberal MPs, led by Rudolf Virchow, have repeatedly refused to ratify the government's presented household plan which would ascribe a gigantic budget to the military. Instead, they say the money should be invested in improving the country's infrastructure. Member of Parliament Virchow and Ministerpräsident Bismarck are at it again, not for the first time. Bismarck, ever since being appointed by Wilhelm I., has pushed the case for a strong executive overriding parliament ('British readers, stop me if this sounds familiar), and has famously declared the other German states don't admire Prussia for its snowflakey liberals but for its military strength, and that the big questions of the era won't be decided by majority decisions in parliament but via "Iron and Blood". When he declared that one, Virchow retorted that the government would be pushing Prussia and the rest of the German states into military adventures to cover for the crisis within. (He wasn't wrong.) Other Bismarck/Virchow heated exchanges in parliament included Bismarck demanding immunity (after the war against Austria) and Virchow pleading immunity should not be given because the government was constantly breaking the Prussian constitution, and had to be held to account by the legislative power or parliament would betray its own duty. (Again, stop me if this sounds familiar.)

On June 2nd, though, Bismarck and Virchow duking it out in parliament verbally suddenly takes a new turn when Virchow doesn't just critisize the PM's policy but wonders out loud: "If the Minister President has read the report, then I do not know what I shall say of his honesty.The truth is that the reserves in the State Treasury are decreasing; that the means of carrying on the government without a budget are growing less, and that it is sought to restore the deficiency by a loan, in order to be able still to sit by warm stoves.”

This evidently was too much for Bismarck, who had fought duels in the past. (Duels were actually forbidden by law in Prussia, but just about everyone ignored that and only got a slap on the fingers - some hours in honorary prison - as a result.) According to parliamentary protocol, he "inquired where matters would end, if insults were uttered which demanded personal satisfaction ; and he added to the House: “There is an opportunity for that, if it be agreeable to you.” Virchow would not retract his words; the President would not call him to order.


Wherepuon Bismarck sent Rudolph Virchow a written challenge to a duel. Virchow's first reaction basically amounted to "Seriously?". He wasn't alone. Prussian John Bercow The President of the House of Deputies told Bismarck that "Virchow may not fight, and that it is for the House alone to decide whether a Minister is insulted." Bismarck insisted. Virchow declined, pointing out that this really wasn't how you settled differences of political opinions these days. Negotiations througth third parties ensued as Bismarck wanted it to be known in public that he wasn't a liar about having read documents. (Otto, one sighs with the benefit of hindsight, just own it.) Virchow wrote:


"Your Excellency,

I beg to reply to your favour of to-day’s date that Herr v. Hennig has to-day informed Herr v. Keudell in my name:

1, that I decline the duel.

2, that I am ready to make the statement in the House desired by the Minister-President as soon as I receive the Minister-President’s assurance that there was no personal insult intended to the members of the committee in his remarks on Hannibal Fischer.

As I have gone to the utmost bounds of possibility in making this concession, I should be glad if any further negotiations respecting the wording of the statement might be conducted, as heretofore, through the medium of Herr v. Hennig.

This was acceptable to Bismarck, but it was by no means the end of story, as then the question as to who'd come off as the moral victor was splitting the country. Conservative papers growled that Virchow didn't even have an honor to defend, while Virchow also got mail from all over the country praising him for declining the duel instead of letting himself be goaded into it, thus keeping the law (again, duels were actually illegal in Prussia) and being an example to modern youth. I once saw an exhibition which included one of the sympathy letters, signed by over 700 private Berlin citizens. (A description of the letter in German is here.

The two non-combattants continued to clash in parliament, Bismarck went on to become the "Iron Chancellor" and Virchow continued his duel career as liberal champion and scientist. (As well as his informal career as "person most guaranteed to piss off conservatives". When in the 1880s a conservative conjured up the "horrible" prospect of maybe one day having a Turkish-origin city councillor in Berlin, Virchow retorted: "I am not aware of any article in our constitution excluding Turks from becoming naturalized Prussian citizens, and if, for example, such a Turk existed in Berlin, and if it pleased the Berlin population to vote him into the city council, then, gentlemen, you shall have to accept their choice." )

Now, this is all very telling about Prussia/Germany in the late 19th century, and about Virchow and Bismarck both. But thirty years after it happened, at a point when Bismarck had become one of the ogres of the English speaking world's imagination (and also was on his way out of power due to Victoria's grandson Willy ascending to the throne), a new version of the declined duel story was created, first appearing in, of all the things a "Homoepathic Journal" . Where what happened after Bismarck sent his written challenge is described thusly:

The man of science was found in his laboratory, hard at work at experiments which had for their object the discovery of a means of destroying trichinæ, which were making great ravages in Germany. “Oh,” said the doctor, “a challenge from Prince Bismarck, eh? Well, well, as I am the challenged party, I suppose I have the choice of weapons. Here they are!” He held up two large sausages, which seemed to be exactly alike. ” One of these sausages,” he said, ” is filled with trichinae—it is deadly. The other is perfectly wholesome. Externally they cannot be told apart. Let His Excellency do me the honor to choose whichever of these he wishes and eat it, and I will eat the other.” Though the proposition was as reasonable as any duelling proposition could be, Prince B.’s representatives refused it. No duel was fought, and no one accused Virchow of cowardice.


That's why the English wiki lists the entire affair as "The sausage duel" whereas there's no such thing as "das Wurstduell" in the German version. Sausage or no sausage, though, German history would probably have gone another way if we've had more Virchows in parliament, and thus I take this day to salute him. You were my kind of patriot, Rudolf V.